The Wrecks Which Shall Not Be Named
There are two kinds of people in the world: those who know Harry Potter 7 is opening this weekend, and those who couldn't give a flying wrackspurt.
Now, since John is a HUGE Potter geek (and I'm only a regular-sized one), it makes sense for him to write today's Potter post. However, to make today's commentary enjoyable for all our readers, I, Jen, will be providing muggle-friendly translations.
Take it away, John!
Wow. I'd say I'm too proud to let this Wreckerator take me for a ride with this wreck, but that might seem...hippogriffical.
Heh. Aheh. Heh.
Professor Flitwick was not amused.
Cor! Has Professor Trelawney been foreseeing something GRIM here? [chortle]
On a scale of 1 to 10, I'd give this wreck a 9 3/4.
Bwahahaha!!
[whispering]
No, that was not me being sarcastic. You wanna see me being sarcastic? Ask me how I like your flip-flops.
[more whispering]
Well, where *do* you want to have this conversation? Because seriously: we need to talk about those flip-flops.
"What has it got in its pocketses!?!"
TRANSLATION: Muggle magic is to top hats and rabbits what wizard magic is to blowing your roof off. Word.
[stunned silence]
Elizabeth C., Kala M., Holly E., Audrey B., Becca T., Rebecca J., here's hoping these wrecks were magically delicious!
Now, since John is a HUGE Potter geek (and I'm only a regular-sized one), it makes sense for him to write today's Potter post. However, to make today's commentary enjoyable for all our readers, I, Jen, will be providing muggle-friendly translations.
Take it away, John!
Wow. I'd say I'm too proud to let this Wreckerator take me for a ride with this wreck, but that might seem...hippogriffical.Heh. Aheh. Heh.
TRANSLATION: A "hippogriff" is half horse, half eagle. Kind of like this cake is half airbrush, half blobby bits, and half cardboard. Also, I stink at math. But that's not part of the translation.
What's that, John? Hurry up? Oh. Ok. I'm done. Carry on.
What's that, John? Hurry up? Oh. Ok. I'm done. Carry on.
Professor Flitwick was not amused. TRANSLATION: Short joke.
Cor! Has Professor Trelawney been foreseeing something GRIM here? [chortle]TRANSLATION: See, Trelawney sometimes has the gift, which is the ability to prophesy, and there's this legendary creature called The Grim, and...uh..
[blinking]
It's a fortune teller joke.
[blinking]
It's a fortune teller joke.
Moving on.
On a scale of 1 to 10, I'd give this wreck a 9 3/4. Bwahahaha!!
TRANSLATION: Fractions are [jazz hands] maaaagical.
[whispering]
No, that was not me being sarcastic. You wanna see me being sarcastic? Ask me how I like your flip-flops.
[more whispering]
Well, where *do* you want to have this conversation? Because seriously: we need to talk about those flip-flops.
"What has it got in its pocketses!?!"Well, it's either a green donut on a wand, or he's REALLY happy to see you.
TRANSLATION: Unnecessary. (I hope.)
Here we have a classic case of "Abracadabra" vs "Avada Kedavra:"
TRANSLATION: Muggle magic is to top hats and rabbits what wizard magic is to blowing your roof off. Word.
And finally....
[stunned silence]TRANSLATION: That was a stunned silence.
Elizabeth C., Kala M., Holly E., Audrey B., Becca T., Rebecca J., here's hoping these wrecks were magically delicious!
Categories:
Oh-So-Ugly
0 comments:
Post a Comment