"Good season, bakers, good season! A lot of you showed up, some of you made some stuff, a few gave roughly 65%, and I'd say this Easter was our 'best' yet!
"Now, let's review how our new designs performed this year. Elmer? I believe you have some numbers for us?"
"Yes, thank you, sir. [starting slide show] First up, our 'Clown Face Bunny' here made a huge impression in the 3-7 age bracket...
"...but, unfortunately, most were screaming too incoherently for us to make much of their feedback.
"Next up, 'Dalek Face' seemed to garner a lot of attention from college students in particular:
"Plus at least one customer was spotted chasing his girlfriend yelling, 'EXTERMINATE,' so I'd call that a 'win.'"
"'Bunny brick,' however, went over like a ton of itself:
"I think next year we should add a tail."
"Our cross-over design for Passover, 'Rabbi Rabbit', also had mixed reviews:
"Something about an explosive head injury? I don't know. You guys see anything wrong here?"
"'Well, moving on, 'Ninja Bunny' made a killing, in a manner of speaking:
"So I'd say we made a good call on the throwing carrots."
"'Baby Bunny Cake' was also a hit...
"...er, with
cats.
"Yes, I know it's strange, but we had several customers wander over from the pet aisle, and they told us their cats
loved the feather accents. So that's a keeper right there."
"'Puddle o' Poo,' however, actually got a few complaints:
"It turns out our marketing team was wrong: people only like chocolate icing poo when it's featured on
Cake Wrecks. To quote our Marketing lead Stacey, 'Our bad.'"
"And finally, our Simpsons tribute lamb may need to get chopped next year. (Heh. Aheh. Little joke for you there.)
"Ahem. Yes, it turns out, not
everyone loves Moe the bartender. So next year Marketing suggests we try a Maggie model, with a sugar pacifier."
"It's gonna be
awesome."
And here's some fuel for thought: this wasn't a special order. It was just out in the display case, on the off chance someone was having a nuclear power plant themed occasion worth celebrating.
"I see you're trying to write a letter!
Grey's Podiatry
Ten points from Bakingdor!
See that photo of the little girl under the cake? She's wearing the same expression I had when *I* first saw this cake: confused, disappointed, and slightly nauseated.
To be fair, maybe it's supposed to be the one Harry spit out.
Eat your heart out, Daniel Radcliffe.
Tsk, tsk. Such a noose-ance.
It's Ron's owl, Pigwidgeon.
There is about to be some SERIOUS nerd rage going on in here.
During the traditional "Ongo Longo" dance, the natives express thanks for the year's crops, the tribe's health, and for the glandular defect running rampant in the island's pigs.
The scientists found that results were mixed. Some mice seemed to enjoy the whistling spleen, while others were petrified beyond all bowel control.
As the minutes ticked by, Elmo realized with dawning horror that this was one staring contest he might not win.
Batman would later have cause to regret his rather insensitive "manual control" quip.
Wall-E considered. On the one hand, he adored Eve and wanted to make her happy. But on the other, he was surrounded by mounds of crap.
Dexter: [serious look] "Well, I guess the killer didn't stop... to smell the roses."
Dexter: [taking off sunglasses] "So you're saying he got a little...foot loose."
Dexter: [putting on sunglasses again] "Ab-solutely."
Dexter: [squinting] "So losing his marbles was the last thing to go through his mind."
Dexter: "Huh. Maybe the perp was looking to get a leg up on killings."
Barren winter tree
Circle of sprinkles
A fish in the sky.
Packing foam peanuts, 
Blue, orange, yellow. 
"It sells for $490,000.
"It sells for $893,000.
"It sells for $10 million.
"This mixed-media masterpiece sells for 11.2 million.
'Summer Daisies for Janet'
'Grilled Cheese Electric Chair'
'The Existential Possibilities of Finding Lucky Charms in June While Wearing Rubber Galoshes and a Fez'
'Texas'
'Coffee Cake with Icing'
"Plus at least one customer was spotted chasing his girlfriend yelling, 'EXTERMINATE,' so I'd call that a 'win.'"
"I think next year we should add a tail."
"Something about an explosive head injury? I don't know. You guys see anything wrong here?"
"So I'd say we made a good call on the throwing carrots."
"...er, with cats.
"It turns out our marketing team was wrong: people only like chocolate icing poo when it's featured on Cake Wrecks. To quote our Marketing lead Stacey, 'Our bad.'"
"Ahem. Yes, it turns out, not everyone loves Moe the bartender. So next year Marketing suggests we try a Maggie model, with a sugar pacifier."
...loaf of bread.
Cocaine Bunny sez:
Because the Alien chest-burster scene always makes me hungry.
When it comes to spotting Wrecks, he's all ears.
Just don't leave it unsupervised come nightfall.
