professional cakes - cakes wrecks

Today's cakey slams are not intentional (honest!), but how are the recipients supposed to know that? Especially when you, the cake-orderer, can't stop laughing?

Two words:"plausible deniability." Let's all practice together, shall we?

When this shows up for Beth's birthday:



"Yes, Kyle, we ARE celebrating your going away, but, uh...wait. 'Celebrating' is the wrong word. See, there's no exclamation mark, so it's a sad thing. Try reading it in a sad voice."

I hate to jump on the BP-bashing wagon - and I hope you'll forgive me for being crude - but this sarcastic eco-wreck cake was simply too slick to pass up.

Thanks to skooksie & craftylildevil for spilling the...beans. By the way, I hear cake goes great with Texas tea.



UPDATE! Today, we have a special treat for all our RSS readers: an ad wreck!

The art of cake insults was first discovered on May 4th, 1957 when a frat boy convinced his mother to write "You really are a FAT cat" on his buddy's birthday cake.

Today, many still attempt this sweet yet snarky tradition - but as these cakes show, few master it.


Ah, the classic "conflicting messages" mistake. Look, you can't tell someone you'll miss her and end with "Up Yours" - it makes no sense! The insult is lost in a sea of well-wishes! Odds are she's going to look at you with big Bambi eyes and ask, "Up my what?"

No, you've really got to commit to the insult. Give it your all!

Oh, come on, this is just embarrassing. "You are not the best" with a "ha-ha" chaser? Oh, gee. BURN.

Look, we're going for amusing yet zingy. Try again.

Whoa, whoa, whoa! Er, look, I appreciate your enthusiasm, but this might be going a bit too far. We're aiming for good-natured mockery, not a restraining order. Rein it in a little, eh?


Ok, rule #1 in cake insults: misspellings completely destroy your credibility as critic. (Also applies to pretty much the entire Internet. Stay in school, trolls!)


Although, if you're lucky, sometimes a misspelling will result in an even better insult:

I don't take many requests here on CW, but when Katie P. asked for werewolf Wrecks in honor of her friend's new all-girl werewolf book, I was intrigued. Haven't I always said there's a cake for everything? And besides, coming off of Sunday's literary sweets, this seems appropriate.

SO. Werewolf cakes. Right. This should be interesting.

Here we have the elusive half wolf, half cake breed:

Now, you might think that a cake sprouting a wolf head would look odd. That's where the pine sprigs come in.


Ever heard of Hover Cat? Well, here's hover wolf:


Whichever it is, here he is mid-transformation:


Um, I get the feeling you're not buying this. That perhaps your confidence in my werewolf wreck-spotting ability is slipping.

Well, look, you can tell this next one's a wolf by the teeny little bone in front of him:

That's clearly the femur from some poor soul torn asunder by this hell hound human hybrid!

Ignore the weird ripply ear-or-possibly-wing-like things. It's a hell hound. Trust me.
Or, if you won't take my word for it, take a Canadian magazine's:

You know you can trust Canadians, right? And they claim this is a werewolf. I like his little 80's exercise headband and how his ears sprout from the side of his jaw.


Hey, Katie P., Sarah F., Alexander B., & Renee T., do your ears hang low?

Katie, I hope I've done your friend and her book proud. And for the rest of you, if you're tired of hunky guy werewolf books, give Claire de Lune a try.

Okay, I get it. I know we're in a recession. I know we're all cutting corners to save some cash. I know we're all trying to shave precious minutes off our day so we can get home in time for LOST.

But can we stop sacrificing cake in order to save a few bucks? Can't we give every person his/her own special celebratory confection? (And for the love of Betty Crocker, whose idea was it to have less cake around during a party?)

Maybe it's because celebrating several things at once makes for a great party word-puzzle:


Maybe it's because sometimes you need a reason to use up those extra office supplies:


Or maybe it's because busy cakes allow the decorator to hide unsightly monikers amongst a sea of names:

Today's Sweets are in honor of National Children's Book Week. They're also for all of us out there who like to complain when a movie ruins the book. ;)


Harry Potter:


Not sure if this next one is supposed to be a specific title, but there are several Tinkerbell/Pixie Hollow books out now, in addition to the classic Peter Pan:




Here's a test: can you name this classic book icon?





And check out these sweet Where the Wild Things Are cupcakes:


The Spiderwick Chronicles: