professional cakes - cakes wrecks

John (that's my husband, for you newbies) is an absolute master of sarcasm. This is not a good thing. Half the time even *I* can't tell if he's being sarcastic or not, which has led to more than one tiff around bathing suit season. ("Wow, your butt looks fantastic in that. No, really.")

I think the problem is he's too subtle. If you're going to be sarcastic, and you actually want people to know it, you have to give them some clue. You know, like this:


1) It's misspelled, thereby signifying "your" not worthy of spell check.

2) There is no exclamation point, since that might betray some small enthusiasm over the prospect of your presence. Can't have that, now, can we?

3) The gratuitous quotation marks positively reek of passive aggression. Visions of jilted dates and stranded little leaguers spring to mind.

All that, with only three little words! This baker is superb.

So, how can you, the consumer, incorporate a little sarcasm into your own cake orders? Here are a few handy tips:

1. Add quotation marks to everything you don't really mean.




3. Misspell their name. (Especially effective when combined with tip #1 or #2.)

Now this is what I like to call a "sarcasm score!" Present this at the after-game dinner and just watch all those mopey, dejected faces turn into bright red, angry ones in no time at all!


Mary Anne E., Angela M., Sarah C., & Janet R., you guys are absolutely "awesome."

- Related Wreckage: Say What?

We had two great events in the Bay area. At Copperfield's in Petaluma, Amy of Carbolicious provided these gorgeous (not to mention delicious) cake truffles:


And we also had Beth of Out to Lunch Catering provide a yummy chocolate sheet cake. The Copperfield's staff was particularly sweet to us, too. Thanks, guys!

Here are our Wreckplica contest winners:


And their entries:

This one gets an honorable mention, too, because Sandra made it entirely of Twinkies:


In San Francisco we visited Book Passage, a tiny store with a big heart. Y'all packed it out, though, and John and I really enjoyed the more intimate setting. Here are our three Wreckplica winners:

And their entries:

The goodies here were in the form of mini cupcakes, and were provided by Michelle of Teeny Cake and Lena of Sweetface Bakery. Thanks, ladies!

To see all of the Wreckplica entries for these two events, check out the CW Facebook album here.

NOTE: Would the sweet young lady in Petaluma who communicated with me via a hand-written message please e-mail me? Thanks!

I dunno, would you say some hen-pecked Wreckerator just winged this one?


I mean, I don't want to ruffle any feathers, but this isn't exactly poultry in motion.

Now this, on the other hand...


Hey Dana S. & Elin A., you know the expression "running around like a chicken with its head cut off"? Well, apparently, if they keep their heads, they just lay there niiiice and still-like.


- Related Wreckage: Creations That Might Possibly Be Representations of Turkeys

I've been looking forward to posting this since Saturday. [rubbing hands together gleefully] So let's get to it!

The setup: What do you think would happen if two bakeries received the exact same phone order, but interpreted in two very different ways? That was the inspiration Paul of Jet City Cakes had when he and Matt from Starry Nights Catering got together to provide the cakey goodness for our signing at Third Place Books in Seattle.

First, here's Matt's order form:

And his gorgeous cake:

Next, here's Paul's order form. Do you see the tiny difference?

No? Well, maybe you will when you see his creation:



Here Matt and Paul ponder their order forms:



And then size up each other's creations:

Hi, Guys! Anne-Marie here. I live waaaay up north, in the beautiful state of Maine (State motto: "Crap, it's cold!").

In case you were wondering:

1. No, we do NOT all own snowshoes and snowmobiles.

2. Yes, we CAN make it to the bathroom in the middle of the night without the use of a jacket or a flashlight.

3. Yes, we actually DO use the word 'wicked' in everyday conversation, and not just for the entertainment of you tourists.

Next, a few more Maine factoids:


State flower: The Pine Cone. Sure it smells like sap and dirt, but when your nose is frostbitten, everything pretty much smells the same anyway.


State pet: Moose. (Granted, this isn't terribly realistic. I mean, that grass is green.)

State Bug: The Lobster. Break out the butter, folks!


So there you have it: A summary of all things Maine. Next time you're up here, make sure you try the bug. It's only two bucks a pound, ayuh!

Thanks to Allie M, Samantha P. and An O. Nymous, who are obviously wikkid smaht.

For our first "world" tour event away from home, John and I boarded a plane the morning of the 25th, flew for eight hours, and then were taken straight to Powell's from the airport. (There's nothing quite like entering one of the world's largest book stores rolling all of your luggage behind you, btw.) We were astounded to learn that some of you had already been waiting there for hours. Wow. I would make a crack here about Portland needing better entertainment, but frankly I'm just too darn flattered. Y'all rock.

I was immediately ensconced in a back room where, single-handedly, I signed 350 books in just one hour. As super powers go I realize that's not terribly impressive, but I take what I can get. :) (The folks at Powell's are awesome, too. Thanks, guys!)

Then John and I got to do the fun stuff: our slide show presentation and talk with the crowd. For those of you who weren't able to be there, Becky B. was kind enough to send in some audience perspective pics:

John and I are having a fantastic time meeting so many of you on the "world" tour, and we're also having lots of fun seeing what the fabulous bakers who volunteered their services at each event are bringing to feed you guys. We'll be posting more pics of those cakes as the tour progresses, but for today I thought it'd be fun to troll through these bakers' sites and show you some of my favorites.

First we have Johnnie of Something Sweet Cake Studio. I've already posted the great Wreck Tribute cake she made for Orlando, so here are a few of my favs from her site: